haiish

wadd actually happen to me??? ii thinkk ii m nort myself now luh. ii dwunch noe wad ii thinking now lar. can anione TELL ME?! okay. ii just wanted to say tt. we seems to be diff after sch reopen. our sms was like smsing to stranger? ='( ii dwunch like this kind of feeling. we r nort stead. just a NORMAL friend. bernice n all euu all sure noe lar. ya. haiish. those songs eg. -sarang haeyo zhi dui ni shuo, zai jian, wo hui hao hao guo, guo min, jia zhuang, shi jie wei yi de ni, yue ding, dou shi ni. all this song whenever ii listen to it. e moment ii close my eyes. e person ii can onli think of was euu luh. haiish. ii dwunch wanna say tt ii was in love. but ii cant really say ii m totally in love.wad ii can say iish tt we r still normal friend. ii m alwaes waiting ferr my MR.RIGHT. hope in future he will be dere ferr me whenever ii niid him. be my listener. lending me his shoulder. comfort me whenever ii feel down. trust me. this ish all ii wan. though everyone ish nort perfect. at least have one point of it n ii;ll be satisfied. ii m nort hoping a stead luhs. but onli iif he iish my MR.RIGHT ii m sure ii will go ferr it. but ish he? hmms. ii feeling so confuse! wad e hell going on wif me? ii hate myself lar.! though pple alwaes tell me tt love eurself more than loving others. but ii just hate myself can? n ya. zhenghua told me wad ms.tan say. e wad one min smth smth. yupps. ii noe. he oso kinda noe my prob lar. all ii can say n trust was him. n of cos bernice dey all larhhs. ii dwunch tell others but dem. hmms. wads going on wif me this few days? after sch reopen ii feel tt ii m just acting strong. outside ii seems to be fine. but do euu all noe how ii feel inside? so tiring. ii dwunch noe wad ii can do now? other denn sitting dee acting strong infront of euu all. acting happy infront of euu all. whenever ii reachh home. ii lock myself in a room doing nth. though somehow some of euu call me talking to me. but euu all dwunch noe e way ii talk was just acting. as long as euu all r happy ii m fine to continue acting. all ii wan was nort him luh. but we seems to be like stranger ler. ii dwunch wan tt. ii wan e past.! can euu give me back e past n nort e present. as ferr now iish so much diff frm e past. ii dwunch wan tt. we seems to be diff. ii m nort saying euu change. but e feeling iish getting further n further liaos. haiish. bernice! zhenghua! all tt wad shuld ii DO!!??!!!??!!?? ii hate myself even more now! FCUK.